Day 1 or One Day

"Day 1 or one day," This has been a thought that was brought up by a lady in Celebrate Recovery (CR for short). Basically you can either start your recovery today and make today Day 1 or you can start your recovery one day. The choice is yours. Just like the choice was mine. I could choose the day. Here's how I got to my day 1.
Last year I realized that I was using food for comfort and control, especially sugar. So I started wondering if I should cut it out of my life again. Even though I really didn't think I wanted to do so. October of 2017 I decided to cut out sodas. I made a choice to cut them out because I was having soda almost daily. And it was beginning to mess with my sleeping. So, I made a choice to stop drinking soda. This time I enlisted the help of my family. I told them what I was doing and asked them to help to keep me accountable. They did just that. I even got to the point where I would be able to just say, "tell me no," and they would and that would be good enough for me. I knew that if it was completely up to me then I would give in to my cravings and have no second thoughts about it. So when I allowed them to get involved they were there and I was not alone in me cravings. It's been 3 1/2 months now and I have had 4 sodas. I am trying not to be legalistic, which is helping this process, but I also know my boundaries and I cannot go back to using and abusing soda again.
Day 1 happened upon me at CR. I was during chip time that God called me to dance. (For me, that looked like giving up sugar.) I didn't know if I could, or even if I really wanted to. Didn't I have to want to, to make this thing work? I have a fear of failure that plagues me and I had no desire to fail, and yet He wanted me to dance with Him. I wanted to say yes on the one hand, but on the other hand, I really wasn't sure I was ready. It is not an easy thing to give up sugar. I like it a lot. I thought about giving myself a week to think over the idea and get used to it, but He was still standing there, holding out His hand, asking me to dance with Him. I am pretty sure He would have waited for me and still been there had I waited another week, but because I didn't wait, and I did accept His offer to dance, He blessed me. I went up and got my blue chip to tell the group and myself that I was going to start something new. I took the step. It was hard, but I was willing. I knew that I couldn't just say in my own mind that I was cutting out sugar. I had to make it public, to make it known to others, because I struggle on my own. I am better when there are people there holding me accountable.
Day 2 did not go well at all. The morning started out on a sour note, and then continued that way throughout the day. On the plus side, God was there. He helped me through the day, and I didn't have any sugar or extra food that I usually would have had to cope with my frustrations.
Day 3 has been a blessing. When I took Courtney and her friend out to lunch this afternoon the thought went through my head that I could get lemonade for lunch. And then I realized that I couldn't/ wouldn't do that because I was not having sugar in my diet. It was almost a relief. That sounds strange to me, but it was true. It felt good not to have to drink lemonade, or anything besides water.
I do not know what the following days will look like, but I will continue to dance with my Daddy through this new stage in my life.